RV LIFE Podcast
The RV LIFE Podcast, created by one of the premier companies in the RV industry, is for the RV Community with a mission to Educate, Entertain and Explore the RV Lifestyle. The Podcast will explore all things RV Life: living, working, exploring, learning. With host Patti Hunt, full time RVers, content creators, educators and explorers.
RV LIFE Podcast
Facing Fear and Finding Purpose Out on the Road
In this inspiring episode, I (Patti Hunt) sit down with transformational coach and podcast host Gregory Russell Benedikt to explore the themes of purpose, reinvention, and embracing adventure. Gregory shares how he left behind a traditional path to create a life of meaning, travel, and fulfillment. Through vulnerable storytelling and practical wisdom, he guides listeners on how to pursue their own version of success while living life on their terms. Whether it’s the RV LIFE or not. this episode is a must-listen for anyone craving more freedom, purpose, and authenticity.
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Five Top Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware
Letting Go The Pathway of Surrender by David R Hawkins, M.D
Mischa Zvegintzov Episode on all podcast platforms
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What is stopping you from living the life you dream of? I'm Patti Hunt and you're listening to the RV Life Podcast. Gregory, what is the boldest thing you've ever done? That started with 10 seconds of courage.
Speaker 2:What a great question. I think, off the top of my head, the boldest thing that I've ever done that took 10 seconds of what I call terrifyingly bold action is knocking on a stranger's door and asking if I could jump in his swimming pool.
Speaker 1:Wow, and we're going to have to hear that whole story in just a little bit. I want to give some of my newer listeners a little background about me. Four years ago I was living in Las Vegas when COVID hit and, as so many other people, our business shut down. So I was living with my husband, Dan. Business was totally shut down and after several months of that he called me up to his office and he said hey, let's sell everything, buy an RV and travel the country full time. And I literally laughed, thinking that he was kidding.
Speaker 1:And when I looked up and realized this man was serious, I had all kinds of doubt, questions, fear I'm going to say terrifying fear like what are you talking about? What will this look like? Because I was a person that needed to be able to plan and see what things look like. But I decided after about three months of researching and looking into it that I was going to take some bold action and just jump in. And so that's what we did and we had an amazing time.
Speaker 1:We traveled full time for over three years and then, a year ago, my husband got ill and he became cognitively impaired and he is now in a nursing home and he is now in a nursing home. So now, here I am again with major change. And now what do I do? I needed to have lots of courage, I guess, not to just throw in the towel and give up. Instead, I decided to keep going, and so we'll talk more about that story. But I get this idea of bold action. I get this idea of bold action and I know today, Gregory, you are going to give us so much great ideas, thoughts, suggestions, tips, help with how to take that, entertain and explore the RV lifestyle, with the mission to inspire you to live life to the fullest and I know Gregory and I, we have that same mission in mind For those people who are looking for a great place to stay as they travel around the country travel around the country.
Speaker 1:Open Road Resorts has five incredible parks One is in Idaho, one in Nebraska, New Mexico, and two in Texas. All five parks are highly favored parks by you, the RVers, and that is on the RV Life Campgrounds Review site. You could check out all five of these parks by going to campgroundsrvlifecom or openroadresortscom. They are, as I said, amazing campgrounds. But let's jump in. Gregory is on a mission to live a story worth telling while helping others do the same. He is a TEDx speaker and an ICF certified coach who specializes in helping people get the things that money can't buy. He believes what we want most in life happiness, meaning, fulfillment and purpose can't be bought. Rather, they come as a byproduct of having the courage to pursue our biggest dreams and live a life true to ourselves. Through his coaching and speaking, Gregory inspires audiences to face their fears, take bold action and live a story worth telling. Welcome, Gregory Benedict, to the RV Life Podcast.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for having me, Patti. I am really excited to talk to you today for having me.
Speaker 1:Patti, I am really excited to talk to you today. I am so excited. This has been a long time coming, but we have got to go back and tell the story about knocking on somebody's door and asking to swim in their pool. Got to tell us about that.
Speaker 2:Yes, and this wasn't when I was seven years old, when it would have been normal. This was when I was 28 years old. I was a full grown man with a mustache, and this was all part of a 100 days of rejection challenge that I embarked on. So my TEDx talk was all about this idea. I had that fortune favors the bold, which is this great quote that I'm sure everyone listening has heard of. What if that wasn't just a cool quote but really a formula for how the universe works? And the reason I started to think about this is because anytime I would take bold action, I would get out of my comfort zone. I would do something that made my palms sweat. Every time I did that, something seemed to immediately happen in my life. That was really positive.
Speaker 2:And so I embarked on this 100 day challenge of taking bold action and talking to strangers around San Diego, where I live, to put this hypothesis to the test. And so this instance happened on day number four of 100. I got really lucky that this was at the beginning of my journey and not the end, because I knock on this stranger's door, I put on a smile and I say hi, my name is Gregory, and I was wondering if I could jump in your swimming pool. And this man looks back at me, starts laughing and he says sure, I don't see why not. And so from there we film like a 10 second video of me cannonballing in a swimming pool. I post that on Instagram and it goes viral, gets over 350,000 views, and then for the remaining 96 days of my challenge, I have people on the internet telling me what I should do next, cheering me on, and it was just such a beautiful experience and a scary experience.
Speaker 1:And that's the big thing scary. It was the same thing with going RVing really scary. I want people to know what I've realized that I thought as I did things that kind of scared me out of my comfort zone. I always looked at the person, for instance, speaking on stages. So many years ago I would not even have thought about speaking on the stage, but I was in a business where that was just part of it. It scared me to death. I looked at people who were incredible speakers. They were dressed perfect, they sounded perfect, they talked perfect, they walked perfect, they looked perfect, they were perfect. They must have been doing this from the time they were born. They don't understand for me how hard it is.
Speaker 1:And I was in the position where I was going to get on stage and I talked to this these people who were mentors of mine and I said I said all that to them, but you don't understand, I have no skills. You had the skills and they cleared that up very quickly because he said to me the only difference between you and me is that I was willing to face my fear and do it. He said that's the only difference. He said I was scared, I didn't know how to talk, I didn't know how to speak, I didn't know how to walk, I didn't know how to dress, and that just made it so real and I know we're really jumping in quickly here and I'd love that. I do want to go back though a little bit with the backup, because I want people to truly know who you are.
Speaker 1:When you and I spoke, we had this amazing conversation. I don't know how long it went on and I finally got to'm 29. I'm going to be 30 soon, and I was blown away because the way that you spoke and the just your knowledge, you sounded like somebody way older, somebody who had life experience from you know, like a 50 year old, and so you did have some things that led you to this. So can you give my listeners some of the backstory of how you got to where you are at such a young age?
Speaker 2:Absolutely so. I have turned 30. At this point, I'm four months into being 30. And I just want to say thank you so much for all the kind words, and I know I told you this when we spoke, but I am an old soul. I'm at least 96 at heart, so maybe that's where some of these ideas and words come from, but really a lot of it is from experience. And so, going all the way back, I always tell people that my life got interesting in 2020, as I'm sure it did for a lot of your listeners.
Speaker 2:In 2020, there I was. I was working my dream job, or what I thought was my dream job. I was working in private equity. I studied finance undergrad. My senior project was this valuation competition Like I lived and breathed finance and I thought that's what I wanted to do with my whole life.
Speaker 2:And then, about two and a half years into it, I took a look around and I realized that this is not what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I was feeling very uninspired, unfulfilled. I felt like my life had no meaning. And now the world was in this big period of chaos, of turmoil, and I realized that I don't want to be here in 30 years, and if I don't act now, if I don't do something when the world is on fire and no one knows what's going on, then I'm probably going to blink and I'm going to wake up and I'm going to be 55, working in finance and saying, dang, what happened? I didn't want to settle, but here I am, and so I took bold action. Probably for the first time in my entire life, I quit my job in finance and I trusted in the universe, in the unknown, and I'm going to take a step back here and say why I did all of this, because the beginning is so important.
Speaker 2:I was listening to a podcast and I learned about the top regrets of the dying podcast and I learned about the top regrets of the dying.
Speaker 2:So not only it turns out that not only do most of us end up on our deathbeds with serious end of life regret, but that we're all so similar that this beautiful woman, author, bronnie Ware, was able to compile the top five regrets of the dying into a book, and she found out, after working with 500 plus patients on their deathbed, that most people get to the end of their life and they say, wow, I wish I would have had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
Speaker 2:And when I heard that again, I was 24, about to turn 25 at that point and it just punched me in the face because I realized that my entire life, from how I acted to who I was friends with, to the activities I did, to the job I was working, it was all based on other people's expectations of me. And I was wearing a mask, desperately trying to fit in. And so I heard that I let it simmer for a couple months and then that's when I realized I have to quit my job in finance. I need to take off this mask I've been wearing and tell the world what I really want, and when I did that, the most beautiful things unfolded. But I'll pause there for a moment.
Speaker 1:That is actually where we connected. So I met you through somebody else. I had to get his name, mishka, I think it was Misha, yeah, misha, and so I'll put his name in the show notes, but I had been connected to him. I was scrolling through his podcast and saw your episode and it said the five top regrets of the dying Top Regrets of the Dying. It's almost two years now.
Speaker 1:I was sitting with my mother while she was in hospice. I came across that book and I read it and it was so incredibly powerful, so incredibly meaningful. As you're talking about it, emotions are coming up for me because that book absolutely life-changing Unfortunately, I read it way later in life, I'm a lot older than you but absolutely life-changing because we get to the end of our lives. And I sat there with my mother for six months. She was totally conscious, she was, you know, talking. She had three kids, three grandkids and five great grandkids that she was incredibly grateful for, but she absolutely regretted most of her life. She never did anything, she never took any action, let alone bold action and I shouldn't say never, that's a strong word. But in listening to her as she talked about the things she wished she had done and so reading that book while I was sitting with her just again life changing. So I'm going on and on about it. I highly recommend it. Everybody should read it.
Speaker 1:The five type, the five top community I have people on all the time when I have a guest on and I talk about why did you start RVing? And it's usually because somebody died a near-death experience. I didn't want to go through life doing the same thing. I decided to quit my job. Covid hit and it was my chance to just go all in and live life fully. And so the connection is here Now I want you to help my listeners. Some of my listeners are full-time RVers, some are part-time, some are some time. And then there's those people that are thinking about this RV lifestyle. I have people all the time say to me oh, I wish I could do that. I would love to go RV, I would love to travel the country, just to travel, just to go out of your comfort zone. So I know I went on for a little bit there, but let's talk about that. When you say bold action and to some degree that's a little scary sounding, but it doesn't have to be this huge step.
Speaker 2:Right, we could take little steps for the big dream, the bucket list item, we really need to break it down into what I call bite-sized, bold actions.
Speaker 2:Because if you try and chew the whole thing, the whole big dream, at once, you won't work, and that's why so many people sadly die with unfulfilled dreams, unchecked bucket list items, because who you are today is not who you need to become in order to handle that dream.
Speaker 2:So if you can break it down like let's just use the RV, like let's travel the country as an example, step number one isn't buy an RV and go out on the road tomorrow and sell all your things. Step number one is probably research when do I want to go? What kind of an RV do I want? Do I know anyone in my life who's ever done this before? Can I do like a one week RV trip first to see if I even like living in an RV? Like there's so many steps we can take between where we are today and where we want to go. But what so many, so many of us, myself included, get stuck at is we look and we see the big thing and we're like, oh man, I couldn't possibly do that five yearyear trip around the US in an RV.
Speaker 1:So it's really taking bite-sized pieces. And I'm going to go back to a year ago. My husband became ill Again for people who don't know this story, he had a number of strokes that left him cognitively impaired and he is now in a nursing home with no hope of recovering. So I'm left with. My whole life now is changed. We didn't have a home. We had an RV that I never drove, could not drive. Well, I could have learned to if I wanted to, but I had never driven.
Speaker 1:We come back to Pennsylvania, where we have family and support, and you know, honestly, at my age there was a big piece of me that was just like let me just give up throwing the towel. I didn't have a home, my car broke down two months later, my husband's now in a nursing home. This plan of traveling the country and living this life and parking the RV somewhere and being settled in this beautiful area, you know, just totally torn away, and so I feel like it was that let me take one step, put one step in front of the other, finding the courage. You know what? I look back and I can't honestly say I even know how I did it.
Speaker 1:I'm giving this story because anybody out there right now saying but you don't understand what my life's like, you don't know how hard it is, you don't know the challenges I've been through. I'm trying to make it like it doesn't matter what you've been through, it doesn't matter what you're going through. People can come out of it and again, as I said, I'm way older than you, so even at my age I could find my way to pull myself out of it. So what do you say to people that are like, hey, it's too late for me or you don't understand all the stuff that I've been through? What do you say? How do you handle that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, this is a great question. I think there's two things that immediately come up. One misconception that I want to dispel whenever I'm talking about this kind of stuff is that we need to get over the fear first. We need to overcome the fear, we need to work through it all, we need to be confident and courageous and fully put together before we take action. That is absolutely not true, because for most of us, we're very human and the fear is always going to be there. So I always tell people that the fear is fine. Honestly, the fear is an indication that you are normal and you're human and you're not a psychopath. So if you're feeling fear towards these things, you want to do fantastic, wonderful, you're normal, you're perfect. And the next piece is it is going to be uncomfortable, and that is by design.
Speaker 2:And my whole message is around how the universe rewards bold action. The universe is watching, and who honestly cares if that's true, figuratively, or if it's just a metaphor? But if you're willing to consistently get out of your comfort zone and take action before you are ready, that's when these little magic moments happen. We talked about it on our first call. That's the synchronicity, the serendipity. You trust and you take action, despite being scared, and you meet the right people, opportunities start to open up.
Speaker 2:And regardless of your specific situation, you're asking okay, what do I tell people when they're like you don't understand my story, my background, my XYZ. What I say to that is that great, you can still get out of your comfort zone. And the best part about getting out of your comfort zone is it doesn't care about you. It doesn't care that you have all these things going on in your life. The only thing the universe wants to see is that you move your body through space and time to get uncomfortable in some pursuit of a goal, of a dream, because that's really what I believe the universe wants for all of us. It wants us to go after the things we want most in life, and the bad things that have happened to us are just obstacles and really tests to see if we're still willing to go, if we're ready to go, get action, go get uncomfortable.
Speaker 1:There's so much here. I want to talk first about the whole idea of fear. I always thought that people got over their fear, they got past it, they overcame it, they got on stage and they weren't afraid anymore. And it's funny because I've been on stage now in actually places around the country outside of the country. So, but there's still that fear.
Speaker 1:And this last week I was with a friend who was giving a speech I had thought he had given many. He was fine. He was like no, it's scary. And I said the same thing. I said everybody is afraid.
Speaker 1:Before they get on stage or I'm doing the podcast, it used to scare me to death. I could have never imagined doing the podcast alone. It was Dan and I that did it. I knew I had a fallback plan and when push came to shove I had to deal with the fear, know the fear was there and be okay with still doing it anyway. And so what I said to my friend was, yes, it's scary the whole thinking about people without their clothes on. I don't know that that works. I'm not sure that works really well, but it's finding things that do work for you.
Speaker 1:I think the biggest thing for me was when it was acknowledged that when people get on stage, they're afraid. It will get easier over time, just acknowledging that. Just like you said, I'm still okay, I'm good, I'm perfect. I'm like everybody else. I get scared too. So that is a huge thing that I want to emphasize for people. Once I made the decision to go out in the RV, did I get over my fear? Did I overcome it? Did I figure it all out and say, okay, well, I'm set now, I'm not afraid? Heck, no, it was scary, it was incredibly scary. And doing it anyway, wow, when you're on the other side of that, when you're on the other side of something that you do the first time you speak on stage or do something big, there is an incredible feeling there, right, I mean you know, if I can just speak to that, that is the best feeling I have found in this entire world.
Speaker 2:It's that everything you want is on the other side of fear, and if you're willing to go there and search for it, you get this cathartic release. That's like nothing you've ever had before. You know what it's like, everyone listening. It's that feeling of aliveness. You feel like you're actually the main character in a superhero movie. You're not just going through your life on autopilot. And I want to just share two more things about this fear not going away thing, because that's the most crippling, debilitating belief that keeps people stuck is, oh, it's easy for them, they aren't scared anymore. But me, I have all this fear, so I can't do it. So two things I'll say about this. One is that I'm making it a huge part of my mission and my movement and the things I talk about to always highlight that I am always sweating through my shirt. So right now I have sweaty pits, my palms are sweating and like I embrace that and I celebrate it, because when I was in high school, oh my gosh, like having sweaty pits was like the worst thing that ever could have happened to me. I was so scared of it. So now I'm celebrating it because it means that I am living a story worth telling. I'm doing something that matters.
Speaker 2:And the second piece for anyone who listens to this podcast and ends up watching my TEDx talk, it will probably look like I was pretty comfortable up there. And there's two reasons why. The first is that I practiced. I have this little timer clicker thing on my desk. It's like what the bouncer holds to count how many people walk into the bar.
Speaker 2:I practiced that talk 108 times before I got on stage. So I had done it so many times in so many operating environments that I knew that even if I was completely mentally blacked out up there, that the words would still come out because it was a part of me. And second, speaking of sweaty pits, I custom cut an undershirt to wear under the sweater that I was wearing, because I was like, if I don't wear an undershirt under this, I'm going to sweat through it. So I always want people to know that whenever I'm doing something even this podcast I'm still scared. It gets easier in that I've now started to view the fear as fun and an indicator that I'm doing something that matters. But I think my body physiologically, will always still respond with that fear apprehension response which we can always talk about. This too is actually the exact same physiological response as excitement.
Speaker 1:And I used to say that. And so so much here and in so many different directions, my head's going in all different places, because these are things that I know. For people to truly live that their life to the fullest, to live a story worth telling, they've got to acknowledge this, so we're going to be saying this over and over again. One of the things we talked about and I know we're bouncing around are the challenges. I believe that the challenges that we're whether people believe in God, spiritual, whatever they believe in it doesn't matter. We all have challenges in our life. Some are worse than others, some seem unbearable, whatever that looks like. I think those challenges that are brought to us can lead us to a next step, to something bigger and better. And for some people, especially if somebody is going through something right now, that might be a tough pill to swallow, but I believe that in my heart of hearts.
Speaker 1:I was with my mother in a hospice when Dan became ill. She passed away and he had already had a stroke that I wasn't aware of. The way he was acting was totally out of character, so I did not have his support, and this is something I have not shared before. And then for the six, nine months after burying my mother. He is dealing with health issues. We're dealing with health issues that he wasn't willing to, he couldn't handle, he couldn't deal with call it what you want and then leading up to March, where things just got really bad and in April he was in a hospital.
Speaker 1:And again, I'm sharing this. I don't need sympathy, I just want people to realize that whatever those challenges are has led me to maybe a different place. I believe that I have a purpose in life and I believe that, to some degree, my purpose is to inspire people to live life to the fullest, whatever that means, and we're going to talk more about what that means and what that looks like. So I do think challenges are something that I now embrace. Look, I'd like life to be a little easier. Let me just put that out there. Ease would not be a bad thing, but the challenges have got me where I am today.
Speaker 2:So let's go back and again, I know we're bouncing around, but I think that fear is a lot about what people are going to think of me. Would you agree with that? Can you address that? We have such a big fear of this thing we call failure, when in reality, in my experience, failure is just expedited learning. It's just getting feedback really quickly, sometimes all at once, and throw in that it might be in front of other people who are going to look at you and say, oh wow, look at that. It can be very uncomfortable.
Speaker 1:Do you think so? Here's what I've come to realize. First of all, I had a mentor many years ago that said to me what other people think of you is none of your business, and that took me a while to really process and get that that I'm so worried about what other people think Well, why do I care? It's none of my business. Think, well, why do I care? It's none of my business. But the other thing I realized is what I think other people think of me is usually not the case. I think more about what other people think of me than they are taking the time to think of me. Did that come out right?
Speaker 2:It did, and it's a huge lesson that I've learned in my own life and I always remind people people are not thinking about you. We are all so focused on trying to keep the ship afloat in our own life that we don't have time to think about other people and, like you said, if we do think about other people, it is absolutely not what we think they are thinking about us, like that was one of the things when I talk about back in 2020, when I was wearing a mask, trying to be this person that I thought other people wanted me to be. People are so much happier now that I'm just authentic, gregory. I'm no longer trying to be a social chameleon and act the part I thought I needed to be this way to have friends, to get love, and all of that was just nonsense that I had created in my own head.
Speaker 1:That's great. We're going to continue with that. I want to just take a brief break because I want to let my listeners know that if they are looking for an RV, I've got the solution. So when you're an RVer, you want somebody that is with you every mile, whether it's sales or service. That someone is Blue Compass RV service. That someone is Blue Compass RV. They have 100 locations over 100 locations coast to coast, featuring more than 15,000 new and used RVs. They have over 1,000 service bays with more RV technicians than any other dealer. Blue Compass is with you today, tomorrow and the road ahead. Visit a local Blue Compass RV dealer or go to bluecompasscom today, and that's a great way. If people do decide after this show, after this episode, that they want to go try an RV or maybe upgrade their RV, there's the solution.
Speaker 1:Let's go back and talk about regrets and again, we both highly recommend this book. I have to say at my age and I keep referring to my age, no, I'm not sharing what it is, it's just, like I said, way older than you. I look back and, as I said before, I believe the challenges in my life got me where I am. So when I was young, money was always an issue. I had decided that I needed to go to college, graduate, have a career I would retire and then be able to have fun, live my life, whatever that looked like. So I decided to become a teacher.
Speaker 1:Well, as most people may or may not know, teachers do not make much money and everything that I thought was based on money. So I would be happy when I had the better car, the better house, I was making more money, I was doing, you know, being able to buy things, take people places. That was what I believed success looked like and that's what I saw my value as. And so quickly into being a teacher, I was like the money is just not working out. So that whole theory went out the window and as I was teaching, I loved working with the students that I was working with.
Speaker 1:I worked with a lot of at-risk youth that I mentored, but I wasn't fulfilled in any way. I felt great working with the students. I was, but overall life did not feel fulfilling and I knew and this was probably 15-plus years ago that I wanted more, something to kind of change. But where I was going with this is everything that I think happened has happened. The challenges that I faced have led me where I am, so I don't know that I would go back and regret, or go back and want to change anything that's happened that's led me here.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what comes up for me as you share that is that's a good thing. Where you are today is a byproduct of where you've been and all the things that have happened to you. And the way I like to look at regret is that regret and dreams are really two sides of the same coin. The dream is the positive, the light side, it's way more shiny and attractive and it's the thing that you're running toward, whereas regret is the dark side. It's a lot of times what we're running from, but if we can kind of flip how we're thinking about regret, it can be a very, very powerful tool. And so when I sit down with clients or potential clients and I say, okay, like what are your dreams? And they say I don't know, we say what would you regret not doing in your life, you can use regret as a compass.
Speaker 2:Really, both your fear and your regret, these things that we're supposed to not think about and avoid at all costs, are some of the most powerful wayfinding tools we can have, because your fear is going to tell you what you should go pursue, because you're scared of it, because it matters, and regret is going to tell you the things, the experiences, the memories that you want to have in your life, so that when you get to the end of it and you're living a story worth telling, you're telling that story to yourself when you're lying on your deathbed.
Speaker 2:You have this full picture, this full life experience. You feel like you squeezed everything out of life, you didn't put things off, and so regret is so powerful. And to all your listeners right now, just ask yourself what is one thing that you know you would regret not doing in your life? And if you're not going to take the first step on that soon, what are you waiting for? It's only going to get harder as you wait and you wait and you wait. So if you can take one little bold action on that today, that would be a huge win.
Speaker 1:Okay. So, as a teacher, I want to go through and break that down. That was just incredible. So, for my listeners, I want them to pull out their computer, their phone, their paper pencil, whatever they use, and think about that one thing right now, whatever their age is what is something that, when you are laying on your deathbed, you would think back and say I wish I had done that, I wish I had explored, I wish I had taken that trip, I wish I had gotten on that hot air balloon, whatever that is. And for them to pick that one thing and write it down and just start with one small step, one action, one bold action, and one bold action leads to another right. I mean, that's how it all starts.
Speaker 2:The ball starts rolling starts, the ball starts rolling. I have had hundreds, if not thousands, of experiences and I'm so lucky and grateful that I get to experience these and I want to share them with as many people as I can. I get to see this happen in so many people's lives, where they take one small bold action and then something crazy happens, Something unexpected in the best way possible happens. It literally just happened this morning. There's a woman in my community called the Bold Action Community. She made a post in our group for the first time. She just joined.
Speaker 2:In her introduction post she was talking about how she's ready for the next big step in her career. She doesn't know what it's going to look like next, but she's putting it out there. She got a call an hour later from a previous employer, the president of that company, saying we want to bring you back on as a VP. So I see this all the time. Just to share, to go off what you said sorry, I'm getting excited. It's that one little bold action that is the catalyst. It gets things going and it gets things in motion. And then another thing I'll say is that when you take that action, that is success. The moment you take the action, you have already won. It actually doesn't matter the outcome. If you're asking something bold to someone, it doesn't matter what they say. All that matters is you had the courage to get in the arena and to take that first step.
Speaker 1:And that's incredible. Just to play off of that, I feel like sometimes and there's a country western song, I can't think of what it's called but I think sometimes, when we see something we want, when we focus so hard on something, and then that something doesn't happen, that specific thing thing, you know, when I was dating, you know, in college, there was a guy that I, you know, wanted to be with and that was the guy, and that didn't happen. And I've realized after the fact that that was in my best interest. Thank you for not letting that happen. I think that not being attached and it sounds like that's what you're saying not being attached to the exact outcome, this is exactly what it is, exactly what it's going to look like. Keep yourself open, keeping yourself open to okay, this is something I would like. This is something I would enjoy. I want to go out and explore the US. You don't have to know exactly what it's going to look like, right?
Speaker 2:to know exactly what it's going to look like, right 100%, because we can't control what happens to us in life. But we can control how bold we are being, and that is the whole hypothesis of the work I do is that if you increase the boldness in our lives, that's the piece you can control. You inadvertently increase what happens to you in life and all the good things that come Because you're out there, you're taking chances in the best way possible. And one thing that I'll drop in here that's been coming up a lot recently I just went to a conference and learned about this is that for me, bold action is fun, it's exciting, it's playful.
Speaker 2:The risk involved is something that excites me. But for a lot of people, when they hear risk, when they hear uncertainty, when they hear about the unknown, they shut down a little bit and they're starting to think about, okay, safety and basic needs and all these things. And I will playfully challenge you and say that the riskiest thing you can do is nothing. If you don't change, if you don't take that first step, you lock it in that future where you don't change. If you don't take that first step, you lock in that future where you don't do the things you said you wanted to do and you end up with regret. So taking the action is actually the safest option you can do.
Speaker 1:That's incredible and, as you're talking, you described me. My whole life was what is this going to look like? What time will we get there? How long will it take, how much gas will we need? How much money will this cost? All of the details that I have really learned to let go of. I'm going to say most of them. I still have to be reminded sometimes that, hey, we're just going to let go of this.
Speaker 1:That is a practice. It's practicing that muscle, because living in that place where I needed to know what's going to happen in every turn, it doesn't work because, like you just said, life does not work that way. So when I was hit with something good or bad it could have been something exciting, but it wasn't in the plan. Then it would throw me. So even the exciting things now would throw me. So it has taken me time and practice, and the one thing I will say is that I've had coaches, I've had mentors. I read a lot. We talked about the one book, a lot of books that I read that have helped me through this process. And while we're talking about that, let's just let my listeners know how they can reach out to you. I don't want to forget it while we continue our conversation 100%.
Speaker 2:I think the best way is to go to my website, gregoryrussellbenedictcom. We'll put that in the show notes. And then I'm also really active on LinkedIn, so I do a lot of writing on LinkedIn. Shoot me a connection request. I would love to chat with you there.
Speaker 1:And we talked about your TEDx talk that I recommend everybody listening to. That's on YouTube correct.
Speaker 2:That's on YouTube and I think that's the perfect step two. I think step one is what you said pull out your computer, your notebook, whatever, and write down that small step you can take towards something you know you'd regret not doing. And once you have that on the paper and you're feeling a little scared, a little timid, a little nervous, go watch the TED Talk and use that as the activation energy, the inspiration to then go do the thing.
Speaker 1:And this is one of the things that I was really looking forward to. When I think about a podcast episode, I always want there to be steps and takeaways that people can walk away with. I've been to some of these big events where and I won't mention names but the person on stage is this big, energetic person. You leave all motivated and excited and you get home and you think to yourself okay, what do I do now? You think to yourself okay, what do I do now? So I wanted to make sure that people had actual steps that they could start taking as soon as they listened to this podcast episode, and so you've given some great steps for write it down and, if you're inspired, keep writing.
Speaker 1:Like I have a bucket list and I used to think a bucket list was just something you wrote and maybe magically, something happened. It's not A bucket list is I don't want to say it's like a to-do list, because a lot of people that's a heavy concept. Bucket list is, you know, go out and figure out how you're going to create one small part of one of those. And you could speak more on this, but I know for me I would get overwhelmed sometimes with feeling like I had to do so much. Let's just reiterate the small one bold action. Let's talk more about that.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and I think the tips and the takeaways are so important. And to just come back to that one thing that you want to do that you've either been putting off, it's regret, it's a dream. Here are just three quick ways to think about it. So your dream can be something that you've always wanted to do but you haven't quite yet found the courage to do so. It can be something that you know you'd regret not doing at the end of your life, like we already talked about, that you know you'd regret not doing at the end of your life, like we already talked about. And then there's this third category that sometimes help people. It's like what's the thing that you've been putting off until someday or one day Again? That's maybe renting the RV, buying the RV, going out on the road, making that trip happen. And if you can just write it down and start to think about it, I'll actually share another really useful tip here that has changed my life completely.
Speaker 2:It's a concept called a commitment device. So once you have a dream or an idea of something you want to do, but you're human and procrastination and fear and self-doubt and all the things get in the way you can use this thing called a commitment device. And so a commitment device is simply an action you can take in the present moment to lock in a desired future action. The simplest commitment device out there is say that you keep talking about this trip I'm thinking of Bali because I'm looking at your background, patty but say you've always wanted to go to Bali and you keep putting it off. You're like, oh, I can't do it this year, I'm busy, I don't have the money. X, y, z.
Speaker 2:A commitment device would be buy a non-refundable plane ticket for six months from now and you're going. You're either going or you're going to lose the money. So you, basically you lock yourself in. It's like a really fun way to get playful and creative, to lock yourself in to that desired dream or that desired future, and I'll let you speak to it. And then I want to share a really personal example of a commitment device in my life.
Speaker 1:Wow, I mean, that's incredible and that's even sounded a little scary even for me. I've got to be honest, I have been talking since and maybe I shouldn't say this, but I've been talking since last year. I want to go to Italy. It's been on my bucket list for years, but it's that kind of thing that was on the bucket list, you know, maybe someday, and there's no movement toward it. So I decided that no, I am going to Italy.
Speaker 1:I am not thinking about where the money's going to come from, because I want to be able to travel and sightsee and do all the things I want to do and not worry about the money. I don't want to go alone. So you know, it's like who's going to go with me, all of the details. My detail oriented brain still goes into what, if and how about this, and when will I go and when is the right time and who will I go with. All of those things come into my mind and I just put it out there and it's like it's going to happen at the right time in the right way. It's going to happen. So I just kind of put it out there. Never thought about buying a number fundable ticket.
Speaker 2:And that's one example. So two things I'll say to this. One is that you're talking about it, you're putting the dream out there, which is beautiful, because there's going to be someone who hears this episode and is like, yep, I'm going to Italy with Patty. That's how this stuff happens and it works out so beautifully. So that's the first part is you're talking about the dream, which is really really important, and you're talking about it in a safe space that you've created, because sometimes we don't just want to go around sharing our dreams with anyone, because someone might take a look at it and they might go oh, you can't do that or that's not for you. So that's an important piece. The second piece is this commitment device. It's doing something and it doesn't have to be buying the plane ticket.
Speaker 1:But what would be some small thing that you could do, patty, to lock yourself into actually making this happen. Well, you're putting me on this spot now. So for me, when there is something that I want or need, or I literally just put it out there and surrender it, let go of it. Because I know, when I get so detailed and now there's stress in it and there's like concern and fear, and when I just put it out there, I know it's coming, I know it's going to happen. There's no two ways about it, and it's going to happen at the right time in the right way. And so that's how I've kind of over the last few years.
Speaker 1:I guess, when I'm trying to or when I think about something that I truly want, you know whether it's a career, my career, my business, this podcast I wanted a way this is a good example because I wanted a way to inspire people to live life fully, and it was like I was just open to what platform, in what way can I put out information that inspires people? And so the podcast came along and, honestly, when it came along, I was like, oh no, I don't want to do that. I didn't want to add one more thing to the to-do list and I just said, ok, if it's meant to be, it'll be. And there it was, and here it is. And it's almost two and a half years later and it's growing and people is. And it's almost two and a half years later and it's growing and people are listening and I get messages that they're inspired. So I just put it out there and just waited for it to come in the way that it was meant to come. So that's kind of how I've done things.
Speaker 2:And I love that answer because a commitment device is really useful for someone who knows they want to take action on something, but they keep putting it off or they keep letting. And I love that answer because a commitment device is really useful for someone who knows they want to take action on something, but they keep putting it off or they keep letting other things get in the way. There's this concept called resistance, which resistance shows up as fear, self-doubt, procrastination. It shows up as telling you that right now is the perfect time to go clean out your entire garage instead of getting started on the passion project that you said you'd get started on. So a very helpful tool in some cases if you really want to get something done and like lock it in.
Speaker 2:But I'm also hearing you say that your worldview right now and how you've been living your life is it will happen when it's supposed to happen and letting it flow a little bit. So that's also the right answer. Again, there's no. You have to do this one thing when it comes to going after your dreams and living life to the fullest. So I love that and I just really appreciate you sharing that.
Speaker 1:And I think what this leads to is letting people know there are different ways. There's not one perfect. So if people want to reach out to you and work with you or read a book or whatever it is that they do, I know for me, coaching, mentoring courses have been such a big part of helping me get past my year without having the tools that I have, and I'm still learning and growing. So I think the message that I want to make sure people are hearing is there's not one perfect way. We're giving suggestions and tools, but bottom line is you got to take that bold step. Nothing's going to happen if you just sit on the couch Like I don't just sit on the couch and say, oh okay, I'm going to go to Italy. No, it doesn't happen. That way.
Speaker 1:I am looking for and being led to what's my next step? What's going to lead me there? So I think that you know having ideas and suggestions that people look at and try. Maybe you try one thing and you decide you want to try something else. The idea is to keep going. The idea is to not give up, and anybody who tells you or laughs at you or says you're crazy or that's never going to happen. They're probably people you don't want to share that bucket list, your dream life with. You need to find other people that support you, and I found that to be very important.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and you reminded me of something I wanted to bring up, which is, I'm sure that no amount of planning, forecasting, predicting five years ago for you would have ever shown you this life that you would be leading this podcast, hosting this podcast, doing all these things. And that's something that I always remind myself of, too, because I used to be a major planner. I mean, I worked in finance, I was incredibly risk averse, and sometimes you do have to just surrender and let go and trust and know that everything is going to work out in way better ways than you could have possibly imagined.
Speaker 1:Absolutely and to your point, in the last five years if I just took my last five years none of that was on the planning. None of that. You know what happened with my husband going RVing, how that all worked out. None of that would have happened. And by being able to let go and surrender, I was able to come back to Pennsylvania with a Jeep, with a trailer small trailer that had everything I owned in it and allow for the help that I received, the support that I received, the people. Because you know, here I am now, I could have felt judged, I could have felt like, okay, this is done, how do I start over from scratch? There's just so much that by being able to surrender Great book about surrender by Hawkins. It's called Letting Go by Hawkins. It's a power surrender because sometimes in some situations, you have to throw your hands up in the air and say, okay, what's next? I'm willing to believe in what else is possible is what I often say.
Speaker 2:And you said one other thing that we really need to talk about, because it's so important, is that you don't have to get it right the first time. I think life is just one big experiment and you try something. Maybe it works, probably doesn't, and then you iterate, you make a slight tweak, you try something else, and you're constantly just iterating and improving. And that is how you go from where you are today to where you want to get, to this big dream life. It's absolutely not a clear staircase up into the right. It's more like a roller coaster with loop-de-loops and there's holes in the track where you fall back and you go back a few steps.
Speaker 2:And there's this quote I can't remember who it's by, but it's you accrue incremental wisdom as you implement your flawed plan. And I love that quote because one it says oh, my goodness, you're going to accrue incremental wisdom along the way. You're going to learn more, you're going to get better, you're going to discover these new things. But the most important part about that whole quote is your flawed plan, and it speaks to the fact that your plan's going to suck in the beginning. It's going to be flawed. You're going to think you have all the answers and you're going to try it. And then you're going to realize as you get into it that, wow, there's so much more to this world I'm stepping into than I realized. And it's okay to have a flawed plan, and you'll slowly accrue the wisdom you need along the way.
Speaker 1:And that is so incredibly important because I don't think you learn like okay. So there are people that say, okay, I've learned from other people's mistakes. Yes, you can learn some things from other people's mistakes. I used to tell my one kid that had to learn everything the hard way, he needed to touch the fire to know it was hot. He didn't just believe me, but, that said, I do believe you have to fall flat on your face. Pick yourself up to get to your next step. You've got to screw it up. It's going to be messy at times. It's a little younger than you.
Speaker 1:Most of my kids are older than you and she was beating herself up and she said you know, it's a month. I should have known, I should have seen this, all of this stuff. And I said, first of all, you did it in a month's time, instead of getting married, having kids and then learning. And I said, as long as you pick yourself up and look at it and learn and she's already so much wiser than I ever was at her age, or even older than her, it just you. She would not learn how to be in a relationship without going through that. It's painful, it stinks. I'm taking her tomorrow. We're going to go have a hot budge Sunday and take a ride and let her cry. These things that happen are upsetting and they hurt, but it is all about pick yourself up.
Speaker 1:What did you learn from it? Because I've got to look back on my life of so many ups and downs I've been married before and divorced and feel like I screwed up and taking everything that I learned, I you know, having a. I had a master's degree plus 45 credits, so I was a step away from my doctorate degree in teaching Tons of money, spent tons of years like what eight years of training, whatever it was. To wake up after 20 years and say, yeah, I don't want to do this anymore. I mean, for most people they see that as, wow, you really screwed that up. That's a failure. Why didn't you wait another 10 years to full retirement and all of these things?
Speaker 1:No, that wasn't the life that at the end of the day, I would have been happy, laying on my deathbed saying, oh, I'm glad I did that for an extra 10 years. It wasn't the life I was meant to live and I'm just incredibly grateful for people like you that share your wisdom, because it needs to be out there. People need to know that the fear is going to be there, that they have to step into it, that, by taking a bold action, leads to the next step, and the next step, and the next step. And sometimes it's like you said it is totally like a roller coaster with the loop-de-loops in it, and when you go through the loop-de-loops you just have to look at it and what did you learn from it? That's the big thing.
Speaker 2:You just got to hang on for dear life sometimes. And I think, one of the last things. I'll say two things. I can't stop saying things because this is so great. One is like, of course, this is why. This is why every time we talk, we get along so well because you deciding not to just mail it in and wait the 10 years because then you'd have retirement and all these things like that is exactly it. We can't afford to waste 10 years, let alone one year of our life, not living it true to ourselves, because we will regret that.
Speaker 2:And then the second piece we're talking about life being messy. Life is super messy and one of the biggest lessons I'm learning that all of your listeners can implement today is take messy, imperfect action. If, again going back to the fear, if you try and wait until you're not scared anymore, if you try and wait until you're not going to be messy, until you have it all figured out to take action, you'll never get started. And through you taking messy action, you actually give everyone else in your life who's watching permission to go after their dream or to launch their project and not do it perfect. Because one of the most I feel like we've said this already and we're circling back to it, like one of the things that keep us stuck the most is saying, oh, that person is ready. They took action because they were ready. No, they just took action because they were willing to dance with the fear. So, do it messy, do it afraid, do it scared. I mentioned these, all these things all the time, and it's so powerful.
Speaker 1:And I love that. That is a great place to end this part of the conversation that says so much. And again, I'm going to encourage my listeners. They can reach out to you. I will put all of your information in the show notes. Everybody should go listen to the TED Talk after they've written one thing down that they want to do that they do not Imagine yourself like, really close your eyes, think about being on your deathbed, whoever's around you and thinking, wow, I lived the life that I truly wanted to live.
Speaker 1:I have no regrets and I'm happy that I lived the life that I wanted to live. That's the idea, just incredible. I had some questions on my list that I wanted to cover. We didn't get to, but I think we covered so much and this might just lead us to a part two, because there's just so much here. Again, I'm not done.
Speaker 1:I want to ask you a question. I'm going to ask you a question because it is time for the question of the week. It's brought to you by Cool RV and I want to know this is an interesting question, I guess to ask you. I'm going to ask you the question, I'm going to give you a minute to think about it and then I'll come back. What is still on your bucket list? You've done the TED Talk, you're an incredible coach, you've done all of these things, but what is something that's still on your bucket list, a person or place or experience that you would love to still do? And you're young and I hope you have a big bucket list.
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Speaker 2:That's something I've always wanted to do. I feel like I know deep down that the moment I get in a race car and I'm going really fast on a track, something within me is going to come alive. So that one's kind of my funny one, a more serious one that is happening later this year, if everything goes well, is host my first retreat. I've met a couple kindred spirits, literally from across the world and through serendipity that we all have this shared vision for a retreat of reconnecting with nature, reconnecting with yourself and reconnecting with other humans in real life. So we're going to be hosting that later this year. And then the last one and I know you didn't tell me I could get three, but I like to talk. So the third one is start a family. Get married, start a family that's for sure on my bucket list, hopefully to my girlfriend, who I talk about in the TEDx, and I know that's going to be such a big part of my life and what makes life meaningful for me.
Speaker 1:That's amazing and I think that it also goes to what people think I'm putting on their bucket list. Sometimes they think of these wild out there things. But I have to share something, honestly, that I don't know, that anybody knows. I have always wanted to drive a race car. I know, let's go, let's do it. Nobody knows that about me. My first husband, he had a race car that he drove and I was like, yes, I want to get in and do that. So there it is, it's out there now to the world, so that I hadn't put it on my bucket list because it was one of those things that I just kind of kept quiet. But there it is, it's now out to all of my listeners and I really, really want to encourage my listeners. Reach out to you on social media, reach out to me. I'm just emphasizing this because I want to hear what my listeners are thinking. Whether you agree, disagree, tell us we're crazy, it doesn't matter. Reach out my social media is RV Life Podcast on Instagram and Facebook, but let me talk about the featured campground and that is brought to you. Is RV Life Podcast on Instagram and Facebook, but let me talk about the featured campground and that is brought to you by RV Life. Rv Life has a suite of products and one of their big products is campground reviews. All of the reviews are by RVers for RVers, so they are authentic reviews.
Speaker 1:This week's featured campground is Tall Chief RV and Camping Resort in Fall City, washington. It is a Thousand Trails Park, but you don't need to be a member to stay at this park. It is open year-round, which is unusual for campgrounds in Washington. It has 180 sites. And what I loved about this park while I was looking at the pictures the stunning views of the Cascade Mountains with many options for recreation, lots to do. They, of course, has full hookups, they have a dog park and for me, they have cottages and yurt rentals so I could go there and rent a little cottage and stay and enjoy the view. They have a solid 7.6 rating on the RV Life campground site with 91 reviews. So for you to read all of their reviews, just visit campgroundsrvlifecom. You could also see all of the pictures like really look at these pictures all of the amenities of this park. And what's really nice is, once you're on the campgroundsrvlifecom site, you can book this campground right from this site.
Speaker 1:Rv Life Campgrounds is part of the RV Life Pro Suite of Products, like I said, and it is the most comprehensive source for RV parks, campgrounds, resorts, city, state national parks and so much more. You can visit campgrounds at rvlifecom If you are not already an RV Life member. There's a link in the show notes and there's 25% off, and I want to thank you again so much, gregory. You have given so much incredible information. I had some questions written down that went out the window because, as we always do when we're talking, it just flows. I really want my listeners reach out. Let us know if there's more you want to hear on this topic, because I am looking to you know just put out there what the listeners want to hear. So let us know, reach out to you. At where do we go?
Speaker 2:Probably Gregory Russell Benedict on LinkedIn would be best, or Gregory Russell Benedict on Instagram. And again, we'll put my website and the TEDx in the show notes.
Speaker 1:Absolutely. We will do all of that. Thank you again. So much, Gregory.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for having me, Patty. It was so much fun talking with you and I can't wait until we get to drive a race car together.
Speaker 1:There you go. Now I'm really going to be pushed to do that. Okay, I got to make sure my insurance is up and I want to thank you, my listeners, and remind you life's a journey. Live each day to the fullest, without regrets. I'm Patty Hunt and you've been listening to the RV Life Podcast. Thank you.